Rubyisms

IMG_8155Ruby is four and a half, loves her preschool teachers and is under the unfortunate assumption that if she squeezes cottage cheese, ranch dressing comes out. She could play in the bitter cold and snow for hours after everyone else has perished from frostbite on their internal organs. I think she’ll do just fine growing up in Michigan.IMG_6158

Here are a few funny things she’s said lately. I keep a list going on my phone because I want to have a word-for-word record of exactly how she says things. Hope you smile as much as I did as I was transferring my list into this post.

  • “When I’m a mom, can you give me directions to Toys R Us? Because I don’t know how to get there.”
  • At dinner one night, “Clara just nails ranch.” Yes Ruby, yes she does.
  • As soon as we get home from wherever we go each morning, she immediately strips off her clothes and puts on her princess dress. And “princesses do NOT wear socks mom!” no matter how cold the Polar Vortex is making our house.
  • “Penny Penny” has been her horse for years. A couple of weeks ago she renamed him “Torlight Sparkle” and only rides him side-saddle now.
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  • “A somersault takes you places you haven’t been before!”
  • She saw a commercial and told me, “You need to get Charlie some headphones so he can rock too.”
  • “Mom, let’s play a guessing game. What am I about to say?” I never win at this game.
  • “Mommy, where do magicians sleep when its nighttime?”
  • She counted to 188 this morning, but she skipped 31-99. I figured she’d do the same thing once she got to 130, but then she kept going 131, 132, 133 all the way to 188 and stopped. They must teach her things at preschool… or maybe it’s the iPad? It’s certainly not me.IMG_7744
  • One of the things we are working on is doing whatever the preschool teachers have planned instead of telling the teachers what the class should do each day. It’s been difficult for her. “But mom, we just didn’t make bracelets today!”
  • “I just can’t wait to grow up and read sentences!”
  • “Mom! Clara thinks termites are good for your body! UGH!!!”
  • “Mom, is Charlie a human?”IMG_6189
  • One thing that has helped me discipline Ruby lately is simply asking her “who’s in charge?” and helping her listen to and obey whoever is in charge. This is great when Ryan and I go on dates and I tell her “Caitlin the babysitter is in charge tonight.” or “Your teachers are in charge so you need to do whatever they say.” The other day on the way to church she told me, “Mom, you can do whatever you want today. I’m putting you in charge.” This is her twisted way of feeling like she’s in charge of who’s in charge.
  • “That good smell is just blocking my view.” From her car seat the new air freshener in the van was hanging in front of the Garmin. I had no idea she was looking at the map while we drive places. ha!
  • At the mall play place one day she was perching herself on top of all the planets and crazily peering down at kids below. I couldn’t figure out what she was doing, but after a while she came over and told me, “Mom, I saw two boys and I was watching over them because I am an angel!”
  • After preschool one day she said, “My friend Ryosei is Japanese. His family was made in Japan!”IMG_8281
  • Ruby is very much aware of what her siblings shouldn’t be doing. “Clara! Stop rubbing your string cheese all over the table!”
  • “You mean Heaven will be more beautiful than our house? But where will the mermaids be? What what will I wear in Heaven? Where can I swim? Can I bring some of my legos to Heaven? Mama, now lets talk about something else.
  • “Mom, Clara thinks termites are good for your body!”
  • “Look at me mommy! I look like a pickle!!”
  • “Mom, I just can’t handle my sister! Things are just not going my way today.”IMG_8299
  • The “Post Officer” is the person behind the desk at the post office.
  • Every time we drive somewhere, “Put your seat buckles on. Daddy, are your lights on?”
  • A “hanger” is anything you hold onto. The banister on the stairs, the handle on the stroller, my hair… etc.
  • “But 4th grade is for big kids, like giants.”
  • She has been praying out loud at night and it’s my favorite thing. “Thank you Jesus for all the things and everyone in the world and all the animals you have made and I just love what you have done. And I always will love what you have done here and I love you more than anything in the world. Thank you Jesus. I love you. Amen.IMG_8243
  • “Mom! Charlie put his own food in his mouth! He’s such a big magician!”
  • “I bet Charlie will know his name when he grows up!” She loves her Charlie Boy so much.

Speaking of Charlie, 9 times out of 10 when we drop Ruby off at school, she introduces Charlie to her teachers Mrs. Bailey and Mrs. Jacobson, “Would you like to meet my brother Charlie? He’s right here!” She also introduces us to all the new friends she makes at the mall play place every time we go there. Every few minutes she brings a new kid over to where I am sitting and she says, “I made another new friend named _____. This is my brother Charlie and this is my mom. Okay! Bye!” she says as she runs back into the mayhem.

IMG_5593Ruby Dawn is genuine and friendly and delightful. I’m so thankful I get to be her mommy and pray everyday that she’ll keep those qualities as she grows up.

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Claraisms

IMG_6142Sweet Clara Dawn is 2 and a half, loves to sing and dance, twirl in circles, taunt her older sister, hug her little brother, get ticked, act older than she is, collect tiny things, loves Doc McStuffins and giving people “a checkup.” She’s sweet as pie and super feisty and mischievous all rolled into one. Just look at her face!IMG_7823

She adores Ryan. Follows him around, talks to him all the time, asks about him every morning when she wakes up, and gets all excited every night when he comes home from work. Here she is helping her daddy make pancakes on Saturday morningIMG_6420

  • She has the absolute cutest way of saying “my brother ‘Cholly'” when she talks about “Charlie.”
  • She pushes Ruby over then asks, “are you OK Ruby?” Ruby is so dramatic, a tiny push from Clara becomes a full on fainting roll to the floor with sobbing and flailing of limbs. No wonder Clara likes to push her!
  • After I tuck her in at night and say prayers she always wants a kiss and a high-five. If I forget to give her a high-five she will come downstairs and request that I come up and give her a high-five. Once she’s had a high five she can go to sleep. Not so funny at 2am when she’s breathing on my face quietly requesting a high-five.IMG_5760
  • One Saturday we went to the mall so I could do some shopping while Ryan stayed at the play place with the kids. Apparently Clara walked around the whole time crying, “Where is my mother?” and, “I need my mother” over and over. This led to a number of parents being concerned that he mother had left her alone in there. Little did they know, Ryan was standing right there beside her the whole time she was crying for her mother.
  • “If we get wain in ouw jammies, that will take forever. When it wains, we can wear our wainjackets. When the sun goes up it will go up! Just a second! The sun is gonna go up!”
  • “I think my brother likes to sit on the table.”
  • She refused to sit in a booster seat, but loved to stand on it, so we switched her to a full size chair. She likes it.IMG_5820
  • “I have a pocket!” One of the best discoveries in any outfit she is wearing. Unfortunately, she also refuses to get dressed in anything other than jammies or her princess dress lately.
  • Daily questions, “Is it night time? Is it going to wain today? Is it getting dark outside?”
  • “Crackers are good for your body!”
  • “Look at she!”
  • “He is so tall! I can kick really tall!”
  • She always says, “Thanks mom!” for all sorts of funny reasons.
  • During dinner the other night she said, “We have strong muscles to get noodles into our bodies, but you have to chew it up.”
  • During our last drive to Michigan we stopped at a gas station and I let the girls stretch their legs… in the van since it was sleeting and freezing out. Clara loved being out of her seat. It’s the little things.IMG_7844
  • Her hair is still amazing. The sides grow like wildfire and the back has never been trimmed. It’s like a swirly, curly, crazy new hairdo every morning. I still haven’t figured out which direction to comb it.
  • Clara talks more to Ryan when he gets home from work than she talks the whole rest of the day. It’s amazing. It’s like she stores it all up for him and tells him stories non-stop for as long as he will listen. Ryan, of course, loves it. I think she already realizes that she and her daddy are basically the same personality. I’m glad she feels “understood” by him because I certainly can’t give that feeling to her.
  • Lastly, she is always “ice skating” around our house on the rings from Charlie’s toy. She told me, “bye-bye mommy, I’m just ice skating to the pool.”IMG_8088

Claraisms

IMG_4703Clara has become a bit of a chatter bug over the past couple of months. She is in her element when she’s one-on-one. If Ryan or I take her on a trip to the grocery, gas station or car wash without her siblings she becomes the most animated, excited, talkative little person you’ve ever seen. It’s so funny. If you come to visit, feel free to take Clara on a special outing by herself. She will love you forever.IMG_4694

One of Clara’s favorite things is watering the mums. She LOVES to check them out each morning to see how they’re doing and let’s me know many times a day that “we need to water those mums!”IMG_4620

She also reminds me regularly, “we need to clean this house!” I think she must have heard me say that often enough that now she’s telling ME! ha!

Clara love ranch dressing. She recently discovered that we can dip things in ranch… so now she asks for it at most meals. “Can I have some wanch? Can I have some wanch right here? wanch? wanch mommy?”IMG_4855

When we are at the playground or zoo or whenever there are other kids around, Clara sees it as her job to report to me what the other kids are doing. She will run up to me and say, “this kid is on the slide.” or “that kid has a brother.” or “this kid is not being nice to me!”

I let the girls watch a TV show after lunch and before naps most days. While I’m in the process of turning on the TV Clara is always so concerned that It’s not really going to happen. She has no faith that I’ll be able to turn the channel to find her show. She just sits on the couch saying, “No, it’s not gonna come on! It’s not coming on. No. It’s not coming on.” over and over until finally the Disney Junior channel is on. Patience is not her strong suit.IMG_4440

She is 2, so of course, wants to do everything by herself. If I’m trying to put her in her seat for lunch, she says, “No, I can do it myself!” and then proceeds to take A LOOOONG time to do it by herself. The same goes for brushing her teeth, putting on and off shoes, coats, gloves, hats, or getting into or out of her car seat. “I want to sit on my own bottom!”

IMG_4489This last picture shows how frustrated she was that she didn’t fit in her doll’s cradle the other day. She’s such a character. I never wonder how she’s feeling because her face makes it VERY clear! She says cute things like “pischker” instead of “picture”, knows her colors, is learning to identify some letters, can sing the ABC’s, Jesus Loves Me, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. She LOVES getting tickled and has such a great laugh. She is still taking a solid 2-3 hour nap every afternoon and I have not yet figured out which direction to comb her hair.

Rubyisms

IMG_4605It’s due time for a new batch of Rubyisms. She is almost 4 and a half, loves to learn, and loves to talk. Sometimes if there is a moment of silence, she’ll just say, “Mom, let’s talk about something. Hmmmm. What should we talk about?” Then I’ll ask her what she wants to talk about and she will say something like, “Let’s talk about our favorite planets” or, “Lets talk about what babies like to eat.”photo-95

  • “Remember last year when we went to the Apple Portrait? I just love going to the apple portrait.”
  • “Mommy! I’m not acting like a baby. I don’t even have a baby hat!”
  • “When I go to Heaven I’m so excited for all the golden streets and magic beanstalks!”
  • The other day during Ruby’s quiet and alone time she came out of her room and told me, “Mom, I saw an adult named John!” I was alarmed… she went on to tell me, “He told me his name.” I asked her where John was and she said he was working outside but “he could hear me out the window!” Yep, she was talking out her bedroom window to a lawn guy working at the neighbors house. Obviously alone time is not her favorite thing.
  • “That one is Neptune. It’s the cold one. Brrrr. It’s cold because it’s filled with water. It’s no place for a picnic!”
  • I’ve been talking to her about honesty, I said, “Don’t lie Ruby. We always want to be honest with one another. We always tell the truth, no lying.” to which she responded, “But mommy! When I’m lying down I’m just tired!”IMG_4783
  • “I’m just going to go in this meadow to find a collection.”
  • “Keep your eye out for Giant Eagle because that means we’re close to our house!” (that’s the name of our grocery store)
  • I asked what she did at school today, “Well I learned about caterpillars and had a nice snack.”
  • This weekend Ruby asked Ryan, “Daddy, what planet is Disneyland on?”
  • We had some friends over for dinner Saturday night and Ruby asked my friend Liz what state she lives in. When Liz replied, “Ohio” Ruby was so excited, “I LIVE IN OHIO TOO! WE LIVE IN THE SAME STATE!!”
  • “Mom, did you know that only daddy and papa can argue with snakes? Because snakes can be dangerous so only daddy and papa can argue with them.”IMG_4245

Preschool Drop Off: The Bane of My Existence

Hello! I’m back! After researching my options and talking to some really smart people I’m back to blogging and couldn’t be more happy about it. I’ve realized again why I do this. I love sharing our life with you, it makes me happy to record the daily happenings of our life this way. If I didn’t write down the funny little stuff that happens on a daily basis, I wouldn’t be able to look back in a few years and remember those things.

Let me tell you a little story about today, for example: There are few things in my life that cause more stress than dropping Ruby off at Preschool. We can’t leave some kids in the car while we take one inside, which is unfortunate. Ruby’s classroom is down a flight of stairs, which is also unfortunate because I can’t take my stroller. Picture me parking my van, climbing into the back seat to unbuckle Ruby and Clara then getting Charlie’s huge car seat out of the other side of the van. I’ve got Charlie’s seat in the crook of my left elbow while I hold Clara’s hand with my right hand. Ruby holds Clara’s other hand… except that Clara is 2, so she doesn’t want to hold anyone’s hand… so I’m mostly dragging her by one arm across the parking lot into the school gate.

Once we are through the gate (which Clara opened and closed for us “I want to do it myself!!”) we have to walk through the playground to the door of the preschool. Clara is 2, so she wants to play, not “pass” the playground. The dragging by one arm continues except now you can add a high-pitched and extremely loud and continuous scream to the equation. (Clara screams equally loud if her finger gets cut off or if you make her put the lid back on her marker.)

Once we make it past the playground and thru the door we walk down the hall, down a flight of stairs, then down to the end of another hall to get to Ruby’s classroom. Clara is so excited to see all the fun activities set out on the tables in Ruby’s class. I don’t blame her for wanting to stay and play, but she’s not in preschool yet so she has to go home with me. Ruby hangs up her backpack and puts her attendance name tag on the wall. This is the part where you’d think the story was over. Ruby is in her classroom, right? Wrong. The 4 year olds start their day back upstairs and outside on the playground.

The arm dragging/screaming continues as the 4 of us slowly make our way back out in the hall, up the stairs down another hall and out the door to the playground. You can add to Clara’s screaming some confused crying from Charlie, who by this point cannot figure out what in the world is taking so long and why so much screaming is happening. Ruby meets her teacher on the playground and I drag Clara with my right hand while I carry Charlie’s car seat (which seems to be 10 pounds heavier since we got out of the van) back thru the gate, across the parking lot and back into the van.

It’s exhausting. I do not look forward to the days when pouring rain, driving snow, and bitter cold weather is added to the process.

How was your morning?

See? In a few years I’ll probably get a kick our of remembering how difficult it was to drop of my kid at preschool. If I didn’t blog it, I wouldn’t remember it as well and you wouldn’t get to chuckle at my ridiculousness.

Post from the Past: One Thing I Learned Yesterday

Since many of you have started reading my blog recently, I’m starting a new series called “Post from the Past” where I will (get this…) repost some of my favorite posts from the past. This one is from 2007 when Ryan and I had just moved from Chicago to Grand Rapids to start residency training and didn’t have a place to live yet, so our friend Heidi’s grandparents let us live in their basement.

Do not put Palmolive liquid detergent into the dishwasher!

Cliff and Huddy are the absolute nicest people on the planet. So nice that they have allowed Ryan and I to live in their basement for the last week while they were away on a trip. Because they are so kind, I wanted to be kind to them in return, by cleaning the kitchen and all of the dishes and making the house look nice before they return this weekend. Which is why I feel bad for being a moron and breaking their house yesterday.

Well, not quite breaking, but just doing something stupid enough that it took about 4 hours of clean-up and a phone call to the neighbors before everything was pretty much back to normal.

I saw a bottle of detergent under the sink that had a picture of a sparkly little glass on it, which is exactly what I wanted…so I added the detergent, closed the door and started the dishwasher.

I then proceeded to go downstairs to take a shower. About 20 minutes later Ryan came home from his run and I heard him say, “Something’s leaking over here!” I looked up at the ceiling tiles in the basement and indeed, he was correct. So I ran upstairs and swung open the door to the kitchen, which I found to be completely covered in huge foamy suds. Seriously folks, it was like a movie.

I panic sometimes…and this was one of those times. “GRAB THE TOWELS!! WHAT DO WE DO?? CAN WE STOP THIS THING MID CYCLE?? IF I OPEN THE DOOR WILL MORE WATER COME OUT?? HOW DOES A DISHWASHER WORK ANYWAY? COULD THIS BE BECAUSE OF THE SOAP I USED? NO WAY! THE SUDS DIDN’T MAKE IT TO THE CARPET YET, RIGHT? THIS IS NOT GOOD! DID HUDDY SAY SOMETHING ABOUT THIS BEING A NEW KITCHEN FLOOR? MORE TOWELS MORE TOWELS!! CALL OUR MOMS!! AHHHHH!

Ryan ran back downstairs to see if it was still leaking and to dry the places the water had dripped. I guess those ceiling tiles are pretty much like a sponge, because this one was so water logged that it cracked in half when we tried to remove it.

“I can replace the ceiling,” I thought to myself, what should I fix first??
# 1 Huddy’s New Floor
# 2 The Dishwasher
# 3 The Ceiling Tiles

Then I ran back upstairs to finish drying the kitchen floor. The floor was dry, then I mopped it to make sure there was no leftover soap residue and dried it again. The floor looked great, so I moved on to the next priority – the Dishwasher

I took a cup and scooped the excess foam and water out of the bottom of the dishwasher and into the sink. Then I closed the door and ran the rinse cycle again. I layed down on the nice clean floor by the dishwasher so that I could see the first single drip if it leaked. Within about one minute the suds were forming around the dishwasher door again, so I stopped the cycle and again scooped the water and suds out of the dishwasher and into the sink. I was lost for ideas, and was quite embarassed by my stupidity.

So then, of course, I turned to the Internet to figure out if anyone had a solution to this problem. WWBVD? (What would Bob Vila do?) Apparently, there are a number of solutions. Crisco Oil. Oil, Table Salt, and Ice Cubes. A bar of soap, liquid fabric softener, malt vinegar, milk, or a half-cup of vegetable oil. White vinegar. Baking soda.

According to wikipedia : Hand-washing dish detergent (washing up liquid) should not be used in a dishwasher, as it will create a large foam of bubbles which will leak from the dishwasher. If hand-washing detergent is accidentally used, the foam may be removed by spraying with salt, and the dishwasher should be forced into a drain cycle to remove the soap and water.

So that’s what I tried, and it worked. The only problem left was the ceiling tiles.

I woke up this morning with a plan. I carefully took down one of the ceiling tiles and put it in the trunk of my car. Ace Hardware couldn’t help me, so I went to Home Depot and walked in the front door with my ceiling under my arm. I found the tiles that were exactly right, but they were much brighter white than the one I had in my hand. “That’s going to look funny,” I thought to myself. I asked for assistance and discovered that you can’t buy just one ceiling tile, you have to buy a whole case of 16 tiles. “How many cases would I need to replace Cliff and Huddy’s entire ceiling?” I had to drive back to their house to make a count. I would need at least 3 cases, and would have to buy one of those special saws that cuts ceiling tiles to the right size.

Luckily, I called Cliff and found out that he has some extra tiles and that I shouldn’t buy more.

Needless to say, lesson learned. I hope that this post will save someone from the hassle which I have been hasseling for the last two days.

And again I say, NO MATTER WHAT, never confuse liquid dish soap with dishwasher detergent!

Rubyisms

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  • She called from the upstairs bathroom, “Mommy! This is the first time I peed in a cup at our house!” Horrified I ran upstairs and found that indeed, she had peed in a cup she found on the bathroom countertop. Apparently she remembered me trying to get a urine sample from her at the pediatricians office.
  • While looking very closely into my eyes, “Mommy! I can see myself in your eyes! Your eyes are like a mirror!”
  • “Do you know what kind of good we eat at Halloween? Macaroni and marshmallows and also watermelon! They’re good for you too!”

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  • “When it’s dark outside it’s ominous.”
  • Ryan: “I’m gonna watch the Tour.” Ruby: “Well that’s unsettling.”
  • “Hold on, hold on. Let’s see what’s going on here.”
  • “Aaaarrrgggg! There’s corn everywhere!”
  • “Mommy, we have eyes to see so we can see treasures.”
  • After accidentally head-butting me in the face, “It’s ok mommy. God makes our bodies heal.”
  • “Mommy, if I see a clue then I can totally pick it up!”
  • On a long drive back to Michigan Ryan and I switched seats so I could drive for a while, Ruby told Ryan, “Daddy, thank you for sharing the steering wheel! That’s so nice when you share with Mommy.”
  • I took her to the splash park and instead of playing in the fountains she spent an hour putting mud puddle water into sandwich baggies.IMG_3515
  • “These apple slices are exquisite!”
  • “Is tomorrow not a far day?” She has no concept of how long any length of time is. I’m hoping to figure out a way to help her understand this soon… which could be a long tome or a short time from now.
  • “What’s the big holdup? It’s taking so so so so so looooong! It’s taking FOREVER!!”
  • “Digestive juices help our bodies stay healthy. That’s why we have digestive juices. Every kind of kid and every kind of baby and every kind of mom and dad have digestive juices. Isn’t that great news mommy?!?”
  • When I pulled off her band-aid I told her it wouldn’t hurt too bad. After it was over she said, “It felt good like a blanket!”
  • She asks everyone, “What are you trying to prove??”
  • On the drive home from church, “We learned about praying. We find a quiet place to pray… like how I always go in my closet to pray.” I had no idea she was praying in there. ha!
  • “…and butterflies use their tongue as a straw!”
  • During an intense moment after Ryan and I couldn’t get her to let us get the splinter out of her foot, Ryan told her if it gets infected her foot could fall off. She looked at him with sternly and replied, “But daddy, my foot has bones in it! God made our bodies not to fall apart!!!!” IMG_3482

I am so excited for Ruby to FINALLY start school again. She went 2 mornings a week last year, and starting Sept 9th she will be going to preschool 3 mornings a week. YAY! She went to the dentist and the eye doctor to get all ready for school. Both appointments were the highlight of the week. She loves going to the doctor. ha!IMG_3335 IMG_3391

Claraisms

IMG_3017Clara is a little Who from Whoville. She turned 2 months ago and I still haven’t figured out which direction to comb her curly locks.IMG_2628

Clara loves to sing. She sings about all sorts of things and makes up songs to help Charlie stop crying. I think her favorite song is called “It’s OK baby Charlie” (the title includes all the words to the entire song.) She’s sugar and spice and finds great enjoyment pushing her big sister’s buttons then turning around and giving hugs and kisses the next minute.IMG_2844

Here are some recent Claraisms.

  • I told her, “I love you Clara.” She snuggled her head on my shoulder and responded, “I love me too mommy.”
  • Above all else, she is a big girl. I tell her she looks tired and she says, “I not tired, I a big girl.” If I tell her she’s funny she says, “I not funny, I a big girl!”
  • She loves pretending she’s asleep, then opens her eyes and says, “I’M AWAKE!!” when she thinks someone is looking at her.
  • She loves animals, especially fake ones who don’t get in her personal space or try to lick her face.IMG_3056
  • She calls her swimming suit her “Slippy Sloop”
  • Doc McStuffins is her favorite show and she loves giving people checkups and even says, “check your blood pressure? …looks good!”IMG_2451
  • Charlie is overly loved by Clara. “I give him one more hug.” “There’s Charlie’s nose”… or mouth or eye (as she sticks her finger in it…) we are working on being gentle.
  • Some of her most used phrases are, “I did it!” “Look at me mom!” “I feel better!” “mine!”
  • She likes to watch her shadow when she runs – which is an issue when it’s behind her.
  • Clara is super ticklish and loves having her back scratched. If I’m tickling her, she asks me to scratch her back. If I’m scratching her back, she says, “I want me tickled.”
  • When Ryan comes home from work she runs to the door and says, “Hey Hun, how was your day?”

IMG_3046In closing, she is ready to potty train and I am not. I was looking back at some posts I wrote when Clara was a newborn and Ruby decided to potty train herself before I was ready. My Uncle Matt is probably looking forward to more potty training blogs in the near future.

A Level 10 Situation

You wouldn’t believe the level 10 poo explosion situation I just lived through.

Around here, we have a ranking system based on number of baby wipes required per diaper change. A level 1 = 1 baby wipe required. Level 2 = 2 baby wipes… you get the idea. A level 10 is beyond cleaning with baby wipes and requires a bathtub to properly remedy the situation.

Amazingly, all three of my children have coordinated their pooping schedules so that I am “needed” by all of them at the same time. Charlie is only 3 weeks old, but he is just as guilty as the other 2.

After lunch today I turned on “Doc McStuffins” to occupy the girls for 30 minutes so I could change and feed Charlie before putting the girls down for naps. Ruby and Clara LOVE the show and sing along with all the Doc McStuffins songs. They were happily singing when I left the room.

As I was putting Charlie’s clean diaper on, he decided to dirty it before I could snap his onesie back on. Right at that moment, I heard Clara’s little feet running toward me and she says, “I let my poop come out!” (her words) so I said, “Yay! Good job!” and as she turned to run back into the living room I noticed that her entire shirt up to the nape of her neck was covered in poo. “CLARA!! STOP! DO NOT GO IN THE LIVINGROOM!”

Then I realize she just came from the livingroom…

I decided to leave Charlie in his bed since his poo was contained within his diaper and grabbed Clara before she made it back onto the couch, which is when I noticed that she must have been sitting on the couch when the level 10 situation happened. My eyes followed the trail of poo across the entire cushion and down over the edge where Clara slid off the couch to come tell me her good news.

I told Clara to stand perfectly still with her hands in the air in the kitchen, grabbed an entire pack of Clorox wipes, a roll of paper towel, some 409 and a grocery bag to quickly deal with the poo in the living room and then carried Clara up to the bathtub while the sound of Charlie’s cries got more and more furious. He knew he had been abandoned.

Clara was happy to be in the tub and I was happy to have survived the level 10 situation. Just as I was thinking about how happy I was, Ryan called to tell me that the oil change we took our van in for had turned into 4 new tires as well… $$$! and then Ruby came running upstairs with poo all over the side of her shirt and told me “Clara’s poop is so sticky mom!”

I must have missed a spot in the living room.

I stripped off Ruby’s clothes, threw her in the tub too and within 6 minutes had both girls clean, re-clothed and ready for naps. FINALLY I could tend to poor Charlie’s dirty diaper (a level 2, FYI).

I kid you not, as I was googling “how to clean poop off a couch“, I heard Ruby’s voice from the bathroom, “Mommy, I pooped! I need help wiping!”

Seriously folks. This is my life. Shenanigans.

Ruby Dawn is 4 Years Old!

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4 years ago, a tiny little girl named Ruby changed our lives forever! I can’t believe how quickly 4 years have passed and how much life she has lived already. I’m so thankful I get to be her mama and so excited for the joy, light and happiness she brings to everyone she encounters. We started the tradition of recoding a birthday interview last year when Ruby turned 3. Here’s Ruby’s 4-year old Birthday Interview

Here are a few recent Rubyisms:

  • “Did you know this is enchanted dinosaur food, Mommy?”
  • “Do you like that chicken daddy? Do you like it really much?”
  • While looking VERY closely into my eyes, “Mommy! I can see myself in your eyes! Your eyes are like a mirror!”
  • Ryan’s proudest moment as a gastroenterologist and a father was the other day when Ruby mentioned a symptom and 2 medications from the bathroom. “Mommy, my poop didn’t hurt! Did you put some miralax in my pediasure?
  • “When we are in Heaven, we are going to be with Jesus ALL NIGHT!!!”
  • “girls, girls, girls.” She said this to a group of my friends at SideBySide who were all laughing and talking together the same way I say it to Ruby and Clara when they’re acting too silly and need to calm down.”